Friday, November 14, 2008

Bush Has Only Two Regrets; We Provide More

The satirical political website 23/6 recently ran a story too hilarious not to share. I've cut and pasted an excerpt below. To read the whole thing, click here.

In an interview on Veterans Day, President Bush was asked to reflect on his regrets over his two terms in office. Bush said he regrets, "saying some things I shouldn't have said, like 'dead or alive' and 'bring em on.'" Bush also said he wishes he hadn't spoken in front of the "Mission Accomplished" banner to declare an end to major combat operations in Iraq in 2003.

Okay, that's two! Looks like he needs help with the others, so we threw together a brief list of some of the things Bush should probably be regretting right about now.

A Quick List Of Stuff George Bush Should Regret
(Off The Tops Of Our Heads)

1. His existence

2. His decision to go into politics

3. Not learning how to better run oil companies so he wouldn't have to go into politics

4. His decision to run for president

5. His decision to run for a second term as president

6. Every word spoken into a microphone since January 20th, 2001

7. That time in 2001 when he shouted at Dick Cheney, "You know what, screw it. You run the country if you're so smart!"

8. Ignoring the way Alberto Gonzales was always saying, "Geneva Convention, Schmeneva Schmonvention!"

9. Those times when he let Donald Rumsfeld make decisions.

10. Revealing the identity of a covert CIA operative. Not cool!

11. That time when he said "Osama, Saddam. What's the damn difference?"

12. Letting the country fall into economic ruin.

13. That "wait for this to blow over" position on Katrina.

14. Not learning how to keep from smirking while addressing the nation about certain issues, such as Katrina.

15. Not giving more people hilarious nicknames, like "Turd Blossom."

16. That "Iraq" kerfluffle.

17. Not giving more speeches in front of banners that read, "Danger: Under Construction" or "Not Finished" or "This Mission is going to take at least six or seven years, if we're lucky!"

18. Saying, "All right Harriet, you've talked me into it."

19. Betting Cheney $1,000 they'd lose in 2004

20. Thinking, what the heck, it's just a pretzel

21. Not taking it as a bad sign that Karl Rove has a forked tongue

22. Responding to a report titled "Osama Bin Laden Determined to Strike Inside The United States" by repeating the title in a mocking, high-pitched voice that made Cheney laugh real hard.

23. Not saying, "Brownie, we should sit down for a performance review in the next week or so."

24. Those twenty or twenty-five times when he should have offered his resignation but decided to "wait it out."

25. Not doing more to avoid the inevitable indictments sure to come next February once they start finding out about "the real bad stuff."


Blogger Matt said...

Good to see that you quoted and linked to one of those "neutral/ reliable sources" your buddy accused me of not referring to in another post...


All I have to say, is that at the time everyone thought that the Vietnam war and the Korean war were big mistakes. I think not finishing the Vietnam war was a big mistake. The good news is that we did enough in both of those conflicts to slow down and/ or stop the spread of communism. I believe that down the road we will look back and realize that what we have accomplished in Iraq will be equally or more important than those efforts for preventing an evil group of people and their ideology from taking over segments of the world and that we helped spread democracy.

It is unfortunate that Bush's Harvard law degree didn't give him the vocal rhetoric spreading skills that apparently Obama's Harvard law degree gave him; but I am very glad that Bush had the resolve that he did in Iraq and that he fought to protect LIFE during his 2 terms (pro-life and anti stem cell research). It is interesting that great acts of God and their aftermath were blamed on him, when most of you accuse him of not being able to accomplish anything... (i.e. a hurricane) You know if I remember correctly, all of those people were told to leave and they chose to stay and then complained when their own stupidity/ stubbornness caused them to be trapped for more than a couple of days. And that is the type of "learned helplessness" that an increasingly liberal government promotes. (i.e. more handouts/ programs without accountability)

We most likely are heading into the darkest (morally and spiritually speaking) time in US history. While you and others are singing the praises of gnosticism, regulation on capitalism and human freedoms/ rights, evolution-minded advances, and socialist/ communist advances in this country.

God please help us again, even if we don't deserve it...

1:04 AM  
Blogger Jon C. Fibbs said...

Enough. Really. Enough already. He's done. The Dems won. Be happy. Move on. PLEASE! MOVE ON!

7:56 AM  
Blogger nathan said...

Not until people are held accountable. I never completely bought into the Unity aspect... if that involved uniting with those that I feel need to be investigated for possible crimes (emphasis on investigated). Simply being voted out of office - or in the president's case, allowing his term to expire - is not enough for posterity.

And Matt, I never once pointed you to sources I thought were "neutral / reliable." I only pointed out that your sources were not, so why do you expect those that already disagree with you to take them seriously? You then accused me of trying to take away people's freedom of speech... probably because you have only the most fragile grasp on what that right actually is.

The rest of your "arguments" speak to their own vapidity.

Please provide one legitimate source where anybody accused Bush of creating a hurricane. NOTE: this is distinct from criticizing his administration for his response to said hurricane. (I mention this because you have consistently shown your reading comprehension skills to be somewhat lacking. But why bother improving when the Rapture will be upon us soon?)

That offer still stands to help you move out of what is guaranteed to become our steaming cesspool of corruption and sin in this country. I'd only like to help.

1:08 PM  
Blogger Jon C. Fibbs said...

Nathan, I understand where you are coming from but you are living in a dream world if you think that Bush will ever be held accountable for anything he did while in office. Not going to happen.

8:37 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

I received a fwd email that I just had to share with everyone...


(Whoever wrote this one deserves a HUGE pat on the back!)

Like a lot of folks in this country, I have a job. I work, they pay me. I pay my taxes and the government distributes my taxes as it sees fit. In order to get that paycheck, I am required to pass a random urine test with which I have no problem. What I do have a problem with is the distribution of my taxes to people who don't have to pass a urine test.

Shouldn't one have to pass a urine test to get a welfare check because I have to pass one to earn it for them? Please understand, I have no problem with helping people get back on their feet. I do, on the other hand, have a problem with helping someone sitting on their butt, doing drugs, while I work. . . . Can you imagine how much money the state would save if people had to pass a urine test to get a public assistance check?
I guess we could title that program, 'Urine or You're Out'.

lol, I thought some of you might enjoy that one.

11:02 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

So I was wondering today, how many of you Obama supporters voted for and/ or liked what happened during the Clinton administration? (on national defense, educationally, etc - are you wanting a very similar replica of his administration philosophy?)

Partially I am wondering, is Brandon the only former conservative that is on this site and everyone else is very polarized or are there many people on here that are independent moderates that optimistically hope that Obama will "lead from the center"?

I only ask this, because the way this setup is going it seems this administration isn't going to have a lot of different focuses than Clinton did. The difference is that they won't have many of the checks and balances that were in place while Clinton was in office. (% makeup of the congress and liberal sway of the bills that will be going through this time)

I was just wondering some people's thoughts... Are some of you disappointed that there aren't more "new faces", representing more "change" from Democrat politics as usual (speaking from a recent history view).

I do hope though that Obama learned some things from some of the mistakes that Clinton made in a lot of areas and that maybe he even learned from some of the good things that Bush did. I also hope that the murmurings about his socialist leanings aren't accurate.
I am a little worried about his lack of care about the protection of the innocent though. As the continuum of the devaluation of life continues to move (the wrong direction), more abortions and less justified capital punishment convictions, I am worried about the ethical, intellectual, and emotional atmosphere of our country and what type of example it teaches our children about ethics, morals, responsibility, accountability, and motivation.

We would all like to believe that it is tantamount for those things to be taught to children in the home... And therefore, in a perfect world, if academia remains neutral then the parents would get to form their children. Unfortunately, I am a realist... I know that neutrality and seeking good pure things isn't the most likely reverted to state of humanity. If someone isn't taught to do good and avoid evil/ impurity then they are just going to revert to what feels good and is the easiest most fun thing to do and believe in (and that's what becomes the educational slant from such a society). (evolution/ lack of absolutes, sexual promiscuity/ abortion, legalized drugs, etc, etc).

I am beginning to ramble, but I am wanting to receive more clarification about the mind of a liberal and the aftermath of such an election... (what it says about where our country is going, or wants to go...)

The good news for me is, that I know what I believe and Whom I put my faith in...

But if science continues to improve, I might have to be be stuck in this country/ on this planet for another 60 - 70 years or more and I want it to be a pleasant and fulfilling experience.

9:49 PM  
Anonymous Matthew Delahunt (POD) said...

Although I have had some differences with some of President Bush's policy in recent years, I will be eternally grateful for more positive aspects rather than negative. I wish that he would have been more fiscally conservative, but his leadership during the 9/11 period, and his unwavering stance on the Iraq war in face of overwhelming opposition is something that admire about him greatly. I personally would be honored to meet him someday, and thank him personally for his and for Vice President Cheney's service to the American people. Much of what happened on Bush's terms was completely out of his control. Now the burden of success will be squarely on the liberals in in Congress.

George W. Bush is not deserving of the whipping boy treatment that this blog ascribes to. Text of article on the POSITIVE aspects of the Bush presidency is reproduced below:

George W. Bush Wasn't So Bad

By Issac Cheriyathu

We don’t need to wait for history to render judgment on the positive aspects of Bush’s presidency.

As George W. Bush is leaving the White House, people are already saying he’s among the worst—if not the worst—presidents that the country has seen. History may indeed choose to make the same verdict, but for now let me give a kinder assessment of his eight-year reign. There are four areas in which he was inaccurately blamed for everything that went wrong—the Iraq war, the economy, the energy crisis and the mismanagement of Hurricane Katrina. And there were places where he truly made a positive impact.
As much as I disagree with him about the Iraq war, I cannot hold him as the sole scapegoat. Congress—Democrats included—was complicit in the decisions that led to the war. The same people who were spineless to oppose a popular war called for a cut and run only after the support for that war plummeted in polls. Even though the lies on which the war was based on are despicable, its effect on national security can only be determined in a decade or two. At the very least, if the situation in Iraq continues to improve, we did an overall good thing by helping a people get rid of a tyrant.
Bush was unfairly blamed during the summer as gas prices soared. In the short term, the high oil prices were the result of market forces that are beyond the control of the American president. In the long term, the blame for not having a sound energy policy for the United States goes to every president since Nixon. It doesn’t help a comprehensive energy policy if you blindly oppose all offshore drilling and nuclear plants either. Anyone who cares for the environment would rather do the drilling here in America with measures to avoid oil leaks or spills, rather than have it done in a foreign country whose practices we can’t control.
The main causes behind the mortgage crisis and the credit crunch, meanwhile, include decades of indiscipline, speculation and the resulting over inflation of home prices. It was not George W. Bush who set up Fannie and Freddie and encouraged home ownership even for folks who could not afford it. Bush did not force these people to buy bigger houses than they could afford by lying about their income. He did not force people to ignore the contracts while signing Adjustable Rate Mortgages and then again use any available inflated equity to buy plasma TVs. There was only one policy that could have prevented the catastrophe—responsibility, both personal and corporate.
Bush has also been charged with singlehandedly botching Hurricane Katrina. But he did not design or build the levees that were breached. The Hurricane Contingency plans for the area were formulated by the City of New Orleans and the state of Louisiana. The response from FEMA was inadequate because it was something that nobody has even seen or expected before. It did not help that people in the city ignored the mandatory evacuation orders.
I am not going to anoint George W Bush as the finest president ever. But there are a number of things that he has done well. He showed real leadership at a time when the country was the most vulnerable after 9/11. And he has managed to keep the country safe from terrorist attacks thus far. Even as he is detested around the world, there is one whole continent that considers him in a good light. His achievements in the humanitarian aid in Africa is underreported and underappreciated. HE HAS ALSO APPOINTED MORE MINORITIES AND WOMEN TO HIGH POSITIONS IN THE GOVERNMENT THAN ANY OTHER PRESIDENT. He tried to bring about a somewhat sensible immigration reform that was gunned down by delusional members of his own party. He helped pass Medicare Part D, much to the chagrin of conservatives, to help millions of low income seniors fill their prescriptions.
After all these efforts, the people who are going to miss him the most are liberals. They will have to finally start owning responsibility for the way the country is being run. They had successfully morphed their “Blame America First” slogan to “Blame Dubya First” and once he is out of the White House, there is only going to be a certain period of time before that goes stale.

11:54 PM  
Anonymous Josh B said...

I'm a little late to the game on this one, but I wanted to respond to Matt's third comment on this post.

Brandon is not the only "former conservative" on this site. I'm a regular reader and I would put myself in that camp, though I'd term it "former Republican" rather than "former conservative" (I am "conservative" on some issues).

You ask if us Obama supporters liked the Clinton administration, but I can't really answer that question, as I didn't pay nearly as close attention to politics then as I do now. When Clinton was voted into office the first time I was 13 years old. Ross Perot's charts and SNL's take on the candidates is about all I recall from the 1996 election. When I was finally old enough to vote in the 2000 election, I voted for George W Bush. In 2004, feeling betrayed and disillusioned by Bush, I voted 3rd Party (Libertarian, believe it or not). In 2008 I proudly voted for Obama.

So yeah, we do exist, those of us who are more centrist than partisan and who genuinely hope Obama will "lead from the center." I supported Obama through the primaries and then proudly voted for him for President because I truly believe he is the right man at the right time, not because I'm enamored with the Democratic party. I've grown less cold to the Democrats over the last 10 years or so (and more distant from the Republicans), but neither party has me fully converted. I was genuinely scared of the prospect of the Democrats taking 60 Senate seats in this election.

I guess it remains to be seen whether Obama will become the "lead from the center / uniter" that enticed folks like me to vote for him, or whether he'll fall in line as a rank & file Democrat of old. My money's on the former. Either way, I can promise you the "Socialist / racist / Muslim / anti-freedom / anti-American terrorist" person he was rumored to be by the fear-mongers has absolutely zero basis in reality.

6:53 PM  

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